“Andrew, do you see the way that you work with your patients?”
When I was a Health Care Support Worker for a Community Mental Health Team, I would never had known, that a short conversation in 2015, with a psychotherapist colleague, would send me on a journey of self-exploration and personal and professional development.
Having been told by my colleagues that when working with a patient, I would look at the patient’s journey, how they got to the situation they were in, showing compassion, true empathy and that I was in touch with their emotions. For me, I was under the impression that everyone worked in this manner. I was advised, that I should look to explore what opportunities were out there to enhance my learning and also guide me into putting theory behind my therapeutic practice.
This lead me to initially complete a 10 week counselling taster course with Swansea University, to then funding myself to take up a 2-year Higher Education Certificate in Counselling skills. On completion of this, I had developed my self-awareness, personal growth, self-acceptance and my personal beliefs about myself and others.
Fast forward 3 years to 2020, where I applied for the part-time BSc in Adult Nursing, which I was successful. I was a few weeks into the course, when one night, I was casually reading through a book called “A Handbook for Student Nurses” (Benbow & Al, 2019). I came across a page in the book titled “Emotional Intelligence” and that is when it all clicked and where my journey with emotional intelligence really took off. I had never heard of the term emotional intelligence, but within this one page in this book, I totally understood everything it was about.
In the short piece within the book, it defines emotional intelligence (EI) as the capacity to perceive, evaluate, and effectively handle our own emotions as well as the emotions of others. Then goes on to break EI into four key areas – Self-awareness, social awareness, self-management and social skills, which mirrors Daniel Goleman’s key ideas in his book “Emotional Intelligence, Why it can matter more than IQ”. In relating to this small, one page chapter, I recognised that I was always in tune with my own emotions, my strengths, weaknesses, values and what motivated me. As well, as this, the management of my own emotions, impulses and reactions in maintaining an emotional balance.
At around the same time that I had read the small chapter on EI, I had an online lecture called “Leadership and the Self” with Beryl Mansel. To tie in with the lecture, we were given a “Leading the self” workbook, which was based on developing self-awareness. Within the workbook, the idea that self-awareness is an understanding of a person’s own strengths, weaknesses, and the differing aspects of the self. The workbook also covered how a person can look into their self and grow an awareness of their strengths and limitations, can lead to a person acquiring the insight and skills needed to be an effective leader. This got me reflecting and recognising my own strengths and weaknesses. I was aware that I was a good communicator, adaptable, honest and passionate in the development of others but areas to work on were self-confidence and self-belief. After the lecture I spoke to Beryl about my interest in Emotional Intelligence and how could I look into developing it. Beryl advised me to apply for the Student Leadership Academy (SLA) at Swansea University, which is a programme aimed at students who aspire to lead and make a difference. A key aspect within the SLA is gaining confidence in a person’s skills and an increase in self-awareness. This seemed the perfect programme to understand my strengths and enhance my emotional intelligence.
I spent the week perfecting my SLA application and then the next couple of weeks, nervously waiting to see if my application was successful. When I got the email stating that I had been successful in my application, I was over the moon. I knew I there would be the opportunity to meet likeminded individuals like myself and build strong networks.
Due to covid, the initial 2-day leadership conference was held online. It consisted of motivational speakers from varying health and social care and education backgrounds, interactive group sessions and the opportunity to network. Of the phenomenal calibre of guest speakers, one that stood out for me was Nicola Davis-Job, who is the Acute Care and Leadership Adviser for the Royal College of Nursing Wales. Her presentation on ‘Leading with Emotional Intelligence’ really resonated with me personally, when she talked about resilience, grit, motivation and optimism. The areas that Nicola talked about validated my own characteristics, as an optimistic motivating individual, not only with the patients in my care, but the people in my close circle around me.
As part of the SLA, the delegates were given an Emotional Intelligence Workbook and within the workbook, it discussed how developing the four areas of EI (self-awareness, Social awareness, self-management and relationship management) would lead to becoming more productive and successful in what we do. I could relate to my own ongoing development in these four areas, which has led to a reduction in stress in my personal, work and university life and helped improve the relationships within these areas. Towards the end of the workbook, it listed “Ten habits of emotionally intelligent people” and within these ten habits were two, which really resonated with me personally. Showing respect for and validating other people’s feelings, was something I had always done naturally. When seeing this in the EI workbook, it validated my own empathic ways of being and having and understanding and acceptance of individual’s feelings. Respecting and validating people’s feelings, wasn’t just aimed towards the patients I cared for, but also with the people in my personal life.
Reflecting back on my time leading up to the SLA, I was able to recognise my own elements of emotional intelligence through reading literature. However, I had not been able to fully gauge all aspects of EI, and taking part in the SLA, helped me go deeper into recognising other areas of EI in myself and adapt a growth mindset, surrounding EI. The SLA guided me into realising the importance of EI and leadership, especially in health and social care. The idea that in the workplace, a leader who possesses the ability to regulate their own emotions and demonstrate empathy towards others, will exhibit greater effectiveness. Going forward in my own leadership journey within the health service, I can now acknowledge the importance of the ongoing development of my own EI, through dedication and self-reflection.
At the time of writing this and completing the SLA, I have gone on to successfully complete the national 150 Leaders student leadership programme which is run in partnership between the Council of Deans of Health and the Burdett Trust for Nursing. Furthermore, I was invited back to the 2023 SLA, to deliver a presentation to the new delegates on my experiences on the 150 leaders programme and co-present a presentation on “Developing your Emotional Intelligence”.
By stepping outside my comfort zone and continuing to develop my emotional intelligence, I am truly excited to see where my leadership journey takes me.
References
Benbow, W., & Al, E. (2019). A handbook for student nurses : introducing key issues relevant.for practice (3rd ed.). Lantern Publishing.
Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ. Bloomsbury.
Steve Gutzler Leadership Keynote Speaker and Executive Coach. (2013, April 1). Steve Gutzler. https://www.stevegutzler.com/
Swansea University Student Leadership Academy 